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My mother has always had the personality that in dealing with her is kind of like trying to make cotton candy in a hurricane. In her prime she was a very good business women & did ok for herself financially but I am not so sure that most of her money has not not been blown & potentially leaving her close to running out. Through the years personal family relationships become strained for months to even a year or two at a time with all of her family members due to her personality. My mother assigned her attorney as her executor of her estate many years ago of which our entire family (aunts, sibling, cousins etc...) believe was not wise & furthermore believe the attorney to have questionable ethics. I live out of state but the family her( brother, sister & cousin) have all contacted me today & said I need to come home she is having serious potentially alzheimers related issues & it is getting urgent. If she has not assigned me as her POA what can I do to get her evaluated & depending on needs what will I have to contend with in regards to the attorney being the executor of her estate & potentially even being her POA. Clearly the attorney has no interest in her well being & medical state.
My mother is 81 and she has a POA for health care, POA for finance and Trust document drafted by her attorney to update them from her 1996 documents. Her attorney has now terminated the relationship because he questions her capacity. We went to a new attorney and if my mother wishes to make any new changes on her documents or receive the ones done by her previous attorney then she needs to undergo a comprehensive capacity test by a neuropsychologist that would cost her $2500 to do so. This would result in either she can maintain her ability to keep managing her finances or turn them over to her three adult children to manage. In a sense she already has. She wants to keep the control to make her own decisions. Is it worth the $2500 to have my mother do this evaluation or is there another way to go about this?
NO...as long as YOU have DPOA, YOU are the one who decides everything for her. Nobody can take that away. You are the only that can GIVE it away if you decide you don't want to be her DPOA. I did that once, but then had to be her DPOA again as the guardian was stealing mom's 60 dollars a month for clothing. It was very easy to do..just go to the Social Security office. They are the ones who find the guardian if the patient has no DPOA. The doctor sounds like a quack and it's a good thing you fired him. If I were you, I'd report him...NO doctor should EVER put his finger in your face!!! Ethics!!! I'd sure report him.
I had to fire my mother's primary care doctor while she was in the hospital. He then threatened me in front of 5 witnesses to file petition to have himself, the fired physician, appointed medical guardian. In front of these witnesses one the nurse on my mother's hospital room, he put his finger in my face and I had to repeatedly tell him to step back from my face. He said I was incompetent because I fired him and left her without medical care in the hospital. This happened on a weekend so I got a hospitalist doctor for the hospital to take over immediately until Monday when I got my mother another doctor. Can this doctor file and be granted guardianship over her? I have medical power of attorney and durable power of attorney and have been appointed by her before she got dementia.
Question: I was given POA and guardianship if unable to care for oneself years ago for both my Mom and Dad. They divorced, my father passed and I took care of his stuff. My mother refuses to see me now, long story. My niece was given power of attorney at the assisted living facility the night she returned from "moving her car" in the parking and was found going the wrong way on a highway, 40 miles from her home. The Assisted Living facility had no POA on record so my mother signed one for my niece. My brother, who has been living off my mom claims to have a POA also. Now that my mother has been deemed incompetent by her drs. who's legally responsible. Both my niece and brother live in homes owned by my mom who is going to rapidly deplete her funds and will need state assistance. So, they have a vested interest in trying to control the situation. Am I legally responsible because I was named in her documents? I'm thinking with all the discord, I would be best suited petitioning for an independent guardian, but if there are 2 other POA;s can I even do that?
I have been taking care of a lady with dementia for about 4 years. I am with her in the morning and stay till about noon. I make her breakfast and give her her pills. The rest of the morning we do what's needed to do. I write out her bills etc. Dr. appoinments, groc shopping for her because she gets upset at the store. She really doesn't want to go out. I feed her dinner and give her pills i am there about 1 1/2 hours. this is 7 days a week. I have gone though this from the very beginning. I am not the durable power of attorney. The person who is has very little to do with this person. My lady is getting worst and I am concerned that I could get in trouble I really need to know what I need to do to protect myself. J.
I have been caring for both of my elderly parents for 4 years. They will soon be 89. My mother is totally deaf, blind in one eye and almost blind in the other. My dad has COPD, diabetes, stints in all valves available for such, a pacemaker and, BTW, he is a severe alcoholic. I am 56, single, self employed and have just about had it. I NEED HELP. Combined they have a monthly income of approximately $2,000 and $55,000 in CD's. Dad occasionally goes to the grocery store and buys groceries but I pay all the bills (they live in my house). We had a daily "helper" for about 5 months but I had to pay for her
What is one to do when the parent will not give you power of attorney. My mother is clearly incompetent to any one that spends a day or two with her, but when she needs to, or somebody like the nurse or doctor is around, she is the sweetest and most agreeable patient they have ever seen. Nobody will agree that she is incompetent, and they never see the vicious person she is. We are truely afraid for my father, but it doesnt seem that we can even put her in assisted living, because she doesnt want to go. She lives with my sister at this time. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
We here at Agingcare don't know of a set standard either. Give your caregiver what you can afford -- that gesture will be appreciated. Also, following up by voicing your gratitude also lets her know that she is valued.
What is the usual and customary Christmas bonus to give to a live-in caregiver who has been taking care of my mother with mild Alzheimers for about 3 years? I really want to do the right thing, make sure she feels appreciated, but of course, my mother is on a fixed income. I also have to decide how much to give to the weekend relief caregiver who has also been with us for over 2 years?
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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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POA: How do I make sure I have the legal authority to make decisions on mom's behalf?
We went to a new attorney and if my mother wishes to make any new changes on her documents or receive the ones done by her previous attorney then she needs to undergo a comprehensive capacity test by a neuropsychologist that would cost her $2500 to do so. This would result in either she can maintain her ability to keep managing her finances or turn them over to her three adult children to manage. In a sense she already has. She wants to keep the control to make her own decisions. Is it worth the $2500 to have my mother do this evaluation or is there another way to go about this?
J.